It was almost a year ago that I decided to take a break from the dating scene. After a series of bad relationships, I had enough. At that point in time, I was so busy chasing the next relationship that I forgot to take a minute and focus on myself. I depended on my partners in many ways and needed to take that time away to find and love myself again. I wanted to believe that like the saying, love will come when I least expect it. Luckily, it did. Not too long ago, I started dating one of my closest friends. Though we hit a few obstacles along the way, we managed to move past them and get together. Well, after a few months of dating, I can say full-heartedly, and hopefully without jinxing anything, that I’m the happiest I’ve been in a long time. And yet, I just can’t help but wonder, is my heart at risk?
See, I have never known a love like this. I love him so deeply, and for a change, I feel that love reciprocated. I can see and feel the difference between our relationship with the bad relationships I had in the past. So, in my very typical self-destruct manner, I can’t help but think of all the bad things that could happen. As I said, I never loved anyone as much as I love him, and I am afraid of what will happen to me when it is over. I know I am getting ahead of myself and that I should just enjoy what we have and not focus on the future, but I can’t help it. I don’t want to destroy one of the best things that have ever happened to me. I feel deeply in love with this man, and I’m so afraid he is going to break my heart. Everyone before him was a waste of my time and love. So, for him, I’ll try to put my worries aside and focus on the amazing thing we have. He deserves it.