Coping With Your Ex’s Engagement
September 13, 2019
Jade Kerr

Finding out your ex is engaged is never easy. I wrote about this issue more than a year ago, and now, looking back, I can see how childish and immature my response and I were. Back then, I didn’t know how to cope with my emotions. Now, I’m able to look back, learn from my mistake, and deduct the valuable life lessons hidden in the text.

Having been on the other side more than once, I should have reacted better. I should have never wished for it to be the worst day of their lives. I was and am better than this. Yes, as I wrote, it is never easy knowing your ex is moving on and is set to get married. This is way beyond another fling – it is a commitment to love forever.

It wasn’t just that I was being “selfish and mean” as I wrote previously. I was oblivious. Oblivious to my real feelings, to my ex’s feelings, to everything that we once shared. I attacked without thinking of the consequences. I wanted him to hurt as much as I did. It is painful seeing a person you thought might be the one making a life-changing decision, looking the happiest he has ever been, without you. I wanted revenge; I wanted to see and be aware of everything. It was my main if not only, focus at the time.

This is where I went wrong. Even though it hurts, you have to let go of the past. You have to distance yourself, to step back.¬†Instead of focusing on what was, focus on what that is left. Focus on yourself. Take this experience and learn from it, grow from it. Understand that the relationship ended for a reason. While that person wasn’t the right one for you, focus on finding the one that is.

Now that I’m engaged, I pray that none of my exes feels as I felt back then. What makes me regret the reaction, even more, is the fact that I’ve been engaged myself before, and should have known better. I don’t know what happened to my ex and his wife, but I wish them nothing but happiness and love.

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