Recently, I rekindled a relationship with an ex of mine, who is also one of my closest friends. We have tried multiple times, and up until now, it hasn’t come into fruition. However, one of the reasons that didn’t allow us to be together has come back to haunt us; that reason being his ex-girlfriend.

When I saw him again after all these years for the first time, he was fresh out of the break-up with her. From the very beginning, he was very straight forward. He said that while he has very strong feelings for me, he is still not emotionally available to enter into a new relationship.

So we kept our distance, but then on the second attempt, it was me who declined. Back then, I was finding my feet back in the dating world; I was seeing this guy and wanted to give him a fair shot. Finally, by the third attempt, it worked. We found our way back to each other.

Although it feels like a long time has passed, that isn’t the case. My boyfriend is still hurting from the break-up. What makes it a lot harder is that his ex is part of his circle of friends, and he would like to remain on friendly terms with her. While he made it clear to her that he is at another place and is trying to move on, I recently discovered she didn’t accept that.

Recently, I have seen his ex’s name pop up in his messages. I want to be clear that I haven’t been snooping, I had just noticed it occasionally while he was showing me something on his phone. Seeing this picks at my worse insecurities. It’s very intimidating to know that he is communicating with someone he had such a long and recent relationship with, and it makes me worry.

I trust my boyfriend, and he has been very transparent with me. He constantly shows me just how much he loves me, and I believe in our relationship. I truly hope things will turn out for the better. I love my boyfriend, and I don’t want anything to change.