How I Truly Forgave Him
March 27, 2018
Jade Kerr

Getting over someone is really never an easy feat, no matter how strong you are. It hurts like hell and aches throughout every part of our body. We dream of their smell, their touch, their voices, and the good memories shared together. Especially so if you were in love with them, just like I was (or thought I was, at least). And what’s even harder about getting over someone? Forgiving them for the pain they’ve caused you. How do we really ever get over someone, and fully forgive them?

And no, the answer is not that we never really forgive and forget. We can, and we do. Maybe we never fully forget the experience. The pain might always be a part of us, but we can move on, and we can and should definitely forgive.

So how did I do it, you ask? Well, it took a great deal of time, patience, frustration, more time, self-reflection, new experiences, and deep breathing to be where I am today. It took me time to understand that everything happens for a reason, that everyone comes into our lives to teach us something when we need it most. And for that, I am grateful for the pain I felt.  Most importantly, I understood that feeling that pain was a choice I made myself, and that I am only the one that should control over that power.

It took practicing patience like I had never before, but it showed me that good things really do come to those who wait, much beyond the cliche. I learned that my anger and hurt only led me to appreciate what I now have so much more and that nothing at all (and no one) is worth so much of our precious energy and sensitive love.

Today, I can confidently say that I would not have wanted it any other way. Every so-called negative experience and dark break-up made me who I am. It gave me the insight I needed to stand strong on my two feet and to understand what I really wanted in life – and most importantly, to have the confidence to go for it.  

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