To love someone means loving all of them. It seems trivial, doesn’t it? However, I had the unfortunate pleasure of experiencing it first hand. See, as I mentioned many times before, I have been through a lot of bad relationships, and the one I am going to share with you now is definitely one of them.
We dated while we were both in our twenties. I was madly in love with him and convinced he was the one. However, my love for him kept me from seeing how he has been treating me. His affection blinded me and made me stay in the relationship, which was extremely toxic.
See, over time, his attitude towards me had changed drastically. He started criticizing me for my decisions at first. So, as a result, I asked him about every decision I faced. His opinion guided me through each choice I had to make. Later, he criticized me – my features and my character. I started changed myself according to his requests and demands.
He criticized my weight – I started working out. I wasn’t feminine enough – I started wearing more dresses. I spent too much time with my friends – I pushed them away and stayed home more. While I continuously changed myself for him, he remained the same, finding more and more parts of me he wished had changed.
It was after a while that those closest to me brought my attention to how much I have changed. In the process of satisfying him, I lost myself. I started seeing how toxic this relationship has become to me. I changed who I am to please someone else. After I saw it, I broke it off with him. Despite how awful that experience was, I am thankful for it, as it taught me a valuable lesson.
When you truly love someone, you love all of them. Of course, we may get irritated some times, or find a feature annoying, but when the love is real, you are able to look past it. Now, being in a healthy relationship, I see that. I know that my fiance loves me, all of me. Don’t let anyone change you – this isn’t the way love is meant to be.