I had such a bad day today. Before I carry on with my story, I want to acknowledge that my problems are nothing compared to what others all around the world have to go through, and still, I wish to use this platform to open up about my experiences and reflect on them. So, back to it. I woke up today with zero motivation to go to my workplace. As to be expected, that attitude affected my performance at work today. I made some mistakes and felt like I was disappointing myself, but mainly others, with how I performed. From an objective point of you, I guess you could say I didn’t have such a bad day. I accomplished everything I was assigned, and some people even complimented me for my skills. But it’s those few moments in which I don’t succeed that makes me feel like a failure and ruin my entire day.
Usually, I let these moments win. I give in to defeat, believe I can’t turn my day around, and that I am a complete and utter failure. I am the one who brings myself downer and downer; I am the one to destroy my day. I try to regroup and convince myself that it was a one-time thing, but as soon as I hit another bump, I fall apart. People around me keep telling me that it’s normal; that there are good days and bad days. Well, it’s easier said than done. It’s so hard for me to remain hopeful, and every mistake just makes me impatient and want to curl up and cry or go home. It’s so easy to give up and run away. Sticking around and facing our fears is the brave and hard thing to do, it’s what will eventually make us better and have thicker skin. So, yes, today was a bad day. But for now, I am holding on to tomorrow, hoping it’ll be better.