It was four days before our wedding. I could not have been more excited and ready for the big day. We had already been together for six years, and I had been dreaming of this day since I was a little girl. He never really believed in marriage, but he knew it was important to me and was ready to take the next step. And more importantly, putting our magical wedding day aside, but about the life together that was about to come.
To continue to share this crazy adventure of life together, to have children, to travel together, to grow old together, to do everything together and be partners for life. He was my best friend, my soulmate, my everything. I can’t even believe I’m saying was.
He was extremely sportive and loved to compete in all kinds of marathons and triathlons. He had fallen here and there, but never anything too serious, and it was never my place to keep him at home all day as I would have liked. I learned to trust him and his strength and wisdom to always come back home safe at the end of the day. After all, accidents can happen to anyone.
And somehow, just when everything was perfect, family and friends had already flown in from out of town for the big event, my love for him was feeling stronger than ever, I got a call that changed my life forever. It didn’t matter how strong and wise he was now. A car had crashed into him while he was biking, and he was rushed to the hospital. Ever since then, he’s been in a coma, unable to speak, open his eyes, and unable to hear my voice.
I don’t know to put my feelings into words. A year has passed since then, and it still hasn’t gotten any easier. I still hope and pray every single day that a miracle will happen. The doctors say that even if he wakes up, he will never be the same. But I can’t believe it. I can’t accept it. I don’t understand it.
Why me? Why him? Why us? I never knew that so much pain and grief could exist. I never how crazy life could be, that in one phone call everything could change, in the blink of an eye. I never realized how much I need to take every moment in life and make the most of it. I didn’t know I could love so much.
I ache to hear his voice as I hug him, wishing that he feels me and knows i’m there. I don’t know how to carry on without him and I don’t want to have to. Please, please, please wake up. I need you.