I pondered the idea of therapy for years. I went through quite a few difficult things and always wondered if therapy would help. I could never pluck up the courage to go through. Part of me was ashamed. I had always been a strong and resilient person, and going to therapy was almost like admitting that I wasn’t as self-sufficient as I had thought. I also felt that if I went, then it meant there was something wrong with me.
When I eventually accepted that I needed help, I looked for an affordable route to start therapy, and I signed up. I wasn’t used to opening up and talking, especially not to a stranger. But my therapist was great, and I never felt like she was ‘prying’ or pushing me too far. The first few months were extremely hard, I found myself emotional a lot of the time and I didn’t understand why. It wasn’t until I had my first therapy-related ‘epiphany’ did it all start to make sense. When my therapist would ask me questions about my past that were difficult to answer, we didn’t delve into them then and there. We’d move on. But the question was still sitting in my subconscious until one day, ‘ding!’ I would make a connection and would have an answer.
As the months passed, I began noticing things about myself. I was learning more about the ‘hows’ and ‘whys’ to things that I’ve done my whole life. We uncovered feelings and thoughts and memories that either I didn’t know were there, or didn’t realize how much they impacted the way I live my life today. By understanding where things came from, I slowly started learning how to overcome certain problems. When I look back and compare myself now, to how I was before therapy, I can’t say I’m a completely different person. But I will certainly say that I am a better version of myself. Apart from it being super interesting for me to find out more about myself, I really think it has helped me move forward in life. I don’t think therapy is something to be ashamed of anymore, but rather that it is something that every person can benefit from at some point in their life.